Flashback Friday

This week's flashback Friday is going to be a little different. I usually post pictures from my pregnancy with E but I thought it would be interesting to take a look back onto my old blog and see what was going on in my life at the time and I found an interesting post from this very day 3 years ago. THREE years ago!!! As I reflected on my words from that day, I was brought right back to that place. I can remember feeling those feelings. I remember what I was thinking and feeling as I wrote that post and I remember that scripture following me everywhere. It was at church, on tv, and anywhere else I turned. It spoke VOLUMES to me. I look back now and realize those words were God's promise to me and today as I look around I SEE his promises. No His promises were not on my time line but He has blessed me with so much more than I could have ever imagined and I am so undeserving. Today I sit in a state of thankfulness. I'm so thankful for EVERYTHING. I'm thankful for the journey that has led me to where I am today. Today I sit in a state of remembrance. I remember those days and I SEE where He has brought me. Finally today I sit in a state of hopefulness. He brought me here from there and although times are difficult right now I KNOW He will bring me through because "HE CAN DO IT AGAIN". Oh how I love my Heavenly Father.

The following was written January 26 2009: "Psalm 37"

I would normally post this post on my private blog which only I can view because it is my private thoughts and my trials I have been going through, but I have decided to post this for everyone to see.

Psalm 37
[a]A psalm of David.
1 Don’t worry about the wicked
or envy those who do wrong.
2 For like grass, they soon fade away.
Like spring flowers, they soon wither.
3 Trust in the Lord and do good.
Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.
4 Take delight in the Lord,
and he will give you your heart’s desires.

5 Commit everything you do to the Lord.
Trust him, and he will help you.
6 He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn,
and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

7 Be still in the presence of the Lord,
and wait patiently for him to act.
Don’t worry about evil people who prosper
or fret about their wicked schemes.

8 Stop being angry!
Turn from your rage!
Do not lose your temper—
it only leads to harm.
9 For the wicked will be destroyed,
but those who trust in the Lord will possess the land.

10 Soon the wicked will disappear.
Though you look for them, they will be gone.
11 The lowly will possess the land
and will live in peace and prosperity.

12 The wicked plot against the godly;
they snarl at them in defiance.
13 But the Lord just laughs,
for he sees their day of judgment coming.

14 The wicked draw their swords
and string their bows
to kill the poor and the oppressed,
to slaughter those who do right.
15 But their swords will stab their own hearts,
and their bows will be broken.

16 It is better to be godly and have little
than to be evil and rich.
17 For the strength of the wicked will be shattered,
but the Lord takes care of the godly.

18 Day by day the Lord takes care of the innocent,
and they will receive an inheritance that lasts forever.
19 They will not be disgraced in hard times;
even in famine they will have more than enough.

20 But the wicked will die.
The Lord’s enemies are like flowers in a field—
they will disappear like smoke.

21 The wicked borrow and never repay,
but the godly are generous givers.
22 Those the Lord blesses will possess the land,
but those he curses will die.

23 The Lord directs the steps of the godly.
He delights in every detail of their lives.
24 Though they stumble, they will never fall,
for the Lord holds them by the hand.

25 Once I was young, and now I am old.
Yet I have never seen the godly abandoned
or their children begging for bread.
26 The godly always give generous loans to others,
and their children are a blessing.

27 Turn from evil and do good,
and you will live in the land forever.
28 For the Lord loves justice,
and he will never abandon the godly.

He will keep them safe forever,
but the children of the wicked will die.
29 The godly will possess the land
and will live there forever.

30 The godly offer good counsel;
they teach right from wrong.
31 They have made God’s law their own,
so they will never slip from his path.

32 The wicked wait in ambush for the godly,
looking for an excuse to kill them.
33 But the Lord will not let the wicked succeed
or let the godly be condemned when they are put on trial.

34 Put your hope in the Lord.
Travel steadily along his path.
He will honor you by giving you the land.
You will see the wicked destroyed.

35 I have seen wicked and ruthless people
flourishing like a tree in its native soil.
36 But when I looked again, they were gone!
Though I searched for them, I could not find them!

37 Look at those who are honest and good,
for a wonderful future awaits those who love peace.
38 But the rebellious will be destroyed;
they have no future.

39 The Lord rescues the godly;
he is their fortress in times of trouble.
40 The Lord helps them,
rescuing them from the wicked.
He saves them,
and they find shelter in him.

I've been yearning for a closer relationship with God and I began today. I have been fasting something that is part of my every day life and so far it has been VERY hard, but I desired answers to some of my questions. During my quiet time with God, He revealed Psalm 37 to me.

I have been searching for answers concerning a very important journey and desire in my life. I have been faced with people who are not Christ followers receive the very thing my heart desires and I have wondered, "Why not me?". I admit I was envious and sometimes I still am. I have taken some matters into my own hands and thought that I could make it happen, but my needing to be in control has been replaced with my needing a few moments with Him. I do not want my fruit to be works of my own hands but works of God. I have been angry at those who have what I desire and I have been filled with rage. My temper has been lost numerous times and I am beginning to understand the concept of fully trusting in God.

Though I desire and long for that of which I do not have, I sit surrounded by all I have been blessed with; a roof over my head, food on my table, and my bills paid. I am a truly blessed individual and every day I am reminded just how truly blessed I am.

 WOW! I can't believe the journey I have been on for the past three years. I have changed so much and I still have a long way to go but I know I'm not alone on this journey. I hope you enjoyed my little "blast from the past" and I hope it blessed you as it has blessed me. I never shared exactly what/WHO it was I desired so here is a picture of the desire of my heart that I eluded to in January 2009. God is faithful. God is awesome. God is ALWAYS on time! Happy Friday everyone!!!